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Fear creeps up!

17-bison

A few years ago, I had the opportunity to experience equine coaching.  If you are unfamiliar with this type of coaching you can read more at Wisdom Horse Coaching.  Founders, Lynn and Ann, offered a day long experience.  I had been interested in learning more as well as experiencing the process for quite some time so I jumped at the opportunity with great excitement.

Talk about fear “creeping up” … what a surprise I had as I got ready that morning.  It was a beautiful fall day, perfect for a day outdoors.  While I was raring to go, I also noticed a bit of a tumbling stomach, some shaky hands; coupled with excitement was a physical reaction that I soon identified as fear.  I gave attention to the “twinges” I was feeling.  As I began to unwrap each “twinge”, what became very apparent was that significant fear had crept up.  Since ignoring the twinge had not worked, I did some reflection and writing.

I noticed that one twinge was attached to my lack of experience with horses at all; that prompted fear. I somewhat settled myself knowing that there would be instruction and guidance by seasoned professionals.   That assurance did not quell the all the reactions though.  What else might I fear?  As the unwrapping continued, what surfaced was that due to my inexperience I may look foolish, stupid, whatever.  Knowing that was helpful and I made a conscious choice to put that aside.  Still not completely at peace, another layer unwrapped.  What I discovered was that there was some fear around what I may discover about myself.  I accepted that as great awareness and felt ready to face this fear.

Most fear aside, I felt much more peaceful and headed for the ranch in Wisconsin solid determination to learn what I might.  As I was greeted by folks I knew, it seemed I had returned to my usual curious and adventuresome self.  The twinges were gone and the story continues.  (check out my next blog for the rest of the story)

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